If there are different ways to tell the same truth, how do we know which approach to use? Pray for the wisdom God gives so generously (James 1:5). Begin with the wisdom God already reveals:
The wisdom from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits, impartial and sincere. And a harvest of righteousness is sown in peace by those who make peace (James 3:17-18).
James also says, “The anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God” (James 1:20). We who evangelize also have different personalities. Some of us are hot-heads—quick to anger, ready to rebuke, spoiling for a fight. Do we want to win an argument or win a soul? If the latter, we learn the arts of peace, patience and gentleness. Others of us are softies—avoiding the truth that may offend, trying to please certain people. We need to become “impartial” and “pure” in our devotion to truth, pleasing God above all. “If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ” (Galatians 1:10).
Whatever the personalities, whatever the circumstances, the Bible’s basic principles always guide us:
Walk in wisdom toward outsiders, making the best use of the time. Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person (Colossians 4:5-6 cf. Ephesians 4:29).
The Lord’s servant must not be quarrelsome but kind to everyone, able to teach, patiently enduring evil, correcting his opponents with gentleness. God may perhaps grant them repentance leading to a knowledge of the truth (2 Timothy 2:24-25).
Remind them … to speak evil of no one, to avoid quarreling, to be gentle, and to show perfect courtesy toward all people (Titus 3:1-2 cf. 1 Peter 3:15).