The first thing God said was that there must be a separation between the man who wants to get married and his parents. “a man must leave his father and mother.” Jesus made it very clear that “leaving” parents does not mean neglecting to take care of them. He rebuked the Pharisees and the teachers of the law because they made excuses for not helping their parents (Mark 7:6-13). The apostle Paul told Timothy that someone who does not take care of his own family is worse than an unbeliever (1 Timothy 5:8). In marriage when one leaves his parents, God makes it clear that now a new family and a new home is being started. When a man and a woman get married, they have a new responsibility to one another. They now have, after God, a new “number one” in their lives. This new “number one” is not mother or father. A husband has chosen this woman to be his wife. Out of all the women in the world he chose her. She is his new “number one.” When a woman agrees to marry a man, she decides that he is now her new “number one.” She should never talk about leaving her husband and going “home” to her parents. She left her parents.
This new couple is responsible for their own needs for making money, raising their own family, making their own plans and decisions. God was not talking specifically about a physical separation, although that is often a good thing. God expects this new couple to be mature enough to stand on their own. They still may seek advice from their parents, but the parents should never be controlling. A note to parents: When your child is married let them separate from you. Don’t meddle in their affairs or try to control their lives or make judgments about whom they have chosen.